It has been observed that in our interactions with those around us, we reproduce behaviors of our parents or important others in our lives, mainly during childhood, but also later. These early relationships create patterns, patterns in how we relate when we reach adulthood.These patterns of behavior are internalized and we reproduce them in our lives, behaving in a similar way. During the past, such behaviors may have been helpful and necessary for our mental survival. However, at the current stage of our lives, these behaviors may not be the appropriate way of handling our problems. As a result, problems arise in interpersonal relationships of our everyday life and bother us, even possibly for years. 

 

Through relational psychoanalytic psychotherapy we explore early emotional traumas and work for their healing. In this way we get to the roots of the problems and thus resolve the internal conflicts that were bothering us. All this aims at the mental development of the patient. What happens is that the person comes into better contact with his inner world so that he can express it freely. The analysand succeeds in creating a more solid Ego, a self that is more resilient, with a greater perception of how similar or different it is from others. Thus he manages to better listen to her/his needs, manages to take action to satisfy them and finally, manages to take responsibility for his/her choices so as to shape his/her life as she/he wishes, free from the mental burdens of the past.

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The value of the therapeutic relationship

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The therapist participates actively in the healing process and does not passively listen by remaining silent. That is, the therapist intervenes in the present (here-and-now) of the therapeutic process, keeping in mind his/her patient's past. The aim is to achieve an authentic relationship with the therapist and not simply reproduce the way the client used to relate.

 

Great emphasis is given on how they experience each other during treatment. This may be indicative of the way the client relates to himself and others in his life. It is the exploration of how they experience each other that will provide a new restorative experience of connection for the healer, different from the way they related before. A new pattern of relationship, a new model of relating is created, appropriate to be internalized by the client and applied to her/his relationships outside of the therapeutic room.

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